So I asked Boyfriend if, this weekend, we could be a bit lazy and stay in, order delivery, and play videogames. He was down. Cute and supportive? Totally. But you should never underestimate a geeky boyfriend. They like to mess with your head. And we geeky girlfriends secretly love it because we love to be challenged. But shhh. Don't tell them that.
Today, Boyfriend's attack was on Santa. It started off when Boyfriend said that Narnia was a bit creepy.
Boyfriend: Meh, Santa's the 99% anyway.
me: Yeah but he's the North Pole's Warren Buffett- he's giving most of his crap away.
Boyfriend: It's a toy Ponzi scheme.
me: Oh, this should be good.
Boyfriend : No toys unless you're good. Good is a relative term. So one kid is good; the other kid must be "good-er" in order to get as much toys. And so forth until good outweighs toys. Ponzi scheme.
me: I'd say you ruined my childhood but you kind of enhanced it. Now I respect Santa. Before he was just an idiot giving stuffs away to spoiled brats.
Boyfriend: Yeah, now you know he's a manipulative jerk. And probably Italian.
me: *le gasp* HOW'S HE ITALIAN?
Boyfriend: "Ponzi." Why not Italian?
me: Cuz he's from the North Pole? Cuz that's not where Italy is?
Boyfriend: No one is BORN at the North Pole. People commute.
me: SANTA IS.
Boyfriend: GLOBAL WARMING.
me: OTHER SHOUTY THINGS.
As you can tell from this